You Wouldn't Know
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|You Wouldn't Know|
September 27, 2015
"You Wouldn't Know" is a song featured in Lego Dimensions that plays during the first part of the game's end credits. Like the two previous Portal songs, "Still Alive" and "Want You Gone", it is sung from the perspective of GLaDOS and was written by Jonathan Coulton and performed by Ellen McLain.
With lyrics similar to the two previous songs in which GLaDOS bids farewell to Chell while also taunting her, though with a more positive flair, the music is a ballad similar to "Still Alive".
The song is shown as watched on an Aperture monitor by GLaDOS in her Central AI Chamber, as the credits are shown on the right, while the lyrics to the song are on the left, in a similar fashion to that of the previous songs. The alphanumerics of the lyrics and credits are presented as Lego blocks, the whole screen itself consisting of an orange Lego base plate. Under the lyrics, logos of words related to the song lyrics follow each other, similar to "Still Alive". Before the song starts, the minifigure of Chell drawn with blocks is first shown on the monitor while GLaDOS is looking at the screen, humming. After the credits end, the Anger Core is seen coming out of a portal into the Central AI Chamber in a post-credits scene. Apparently glad to see him, GLaDOS strokes him with her head. After that follows the second part of the credits with no music, then a second post-credits scene in which an unknown character picks up a piece of Vortech's body and instantly becomes corrupted, yelling in pain as he converts into a Vorton being, with Vortech's laughter being heard as the scene fades out.
The song consists of the answer "Test Subject #1" to the report "REPORT BLB-1911/03.10-SJB". A cake recipe is also shown during the instrumental part.
 History and recording
Lego Dimensions makes GLaDOS experience friendship with characters from other universes as well as teamwork, which in the end consists of a more positive experience to her than the previous Portal games. The lyrics of "You Wouldn't Know" reflect this, as this time GLaDOS tells Chell she doesn't hate her anymore, is fine and having a good time where she is, although Chell "wouldn't know" that. This contrasts with the previous songs, which are mostly sad breakup songs, as opposed to "You Wouldn't Know" which is to be seen as a post-breakup song.
While composing the song, Coulton realized that it couldn't be just another Portal song and that he couldn't count on the new song to become a cultural phenomenon like "Still Alive". He also had to evoke the other cultural icons featured in the game, which was eventually Batman, in whom GLaDOS may have fallen in love with a little.
The following lyrics are displayed as in the Lego Dimensions credits. The additional, unsung quotes are in yellow; the lyrics not appearing on screen are bright blue. The lyrics are displayed in an all-caps font, with larger caps for proper nouns or emphasis on some words.
The line "You monster" has been replaced by "[REDACTED]". The "for me" part of "You are never coming by for me" lasts for several notes and is rendered in a apparently random assortment of periods and commas, transcribed here.
The various lyrics-related logos appearing during the song.
- "You Wouldn't Know" at Jonathan Coulton's SoundCloud