Aperture Science Collaborative Disposition Test
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The test, made of 7 questions, is said to have been developed in the late seventies as a way to determine Test Subject compatibility for cooperative testing initiatives. The test was categorized unsafe by Aperture in 1977, after every Test Subject who took the test became immediately insane from having too many unassailable truths and gut-wrenching personal secrets about themselves revealed at once. It was then placed in a locked strong box and secured in an abandoned sub-basement. This sub-basement was then filled with cement, and the doorway bricked over.
The test was said to be discovered "last month", and that after review Aperture scientists felt the results were "inconclusive", requesting a further round of testing, and inviting visitors to take the test.
Depending on the answers given, the applicant will be given an "Aperture Science Cooperative Testing Type", accompanied by a small description. They are listed after the questions. Below the Cooperative Testing Type, the user is invited to "Assist in Disposition Test Recruitment", i.e. post the results on Facebook.
Welcome, test subject, to the Aperture Science Collaborative Disposition Test. With just a few short questions, this test will determine your personality-driven test resolution type, allowing you to further the cause of science with a compatible test subject.
What color do you wish your eyes were?
Do you appear well educated to others?
Are they wrong?
Check all those who you feel superior to:
- War Heroes
- No One
Are you currently being observed?
- Not Sure
Have you ever sued a scientific corporation for an injury you received:
- An Injury prevents me from remembering
If you could remove one constraint on business today, which one would it be?
- Occupational Safety Rules
- Environmental Protection Restrictions
- Consumer Safety
- All of the above
Aperture Science Cooperative Testing Types
||Brave and up for anything - you like adventure and nothing scares you. You value friendship highly. Your ideal cooperative partner would be inquisitive and sensitive.|
||You don't see crises - only challengitunities [sic] you choose to scale like mountains. You're a can-do, shoot-from-the-hip, silver-tongued self-starter. You're a good match for any cooperative test partner, providing they shut up and listen.|
||Resolute and tenacious, you won't quit until a puzzle's solved. Your inability to give up against impossible odds makes you a bad match for cooperative test partners who give up against any odds at all, racing to the internet for answers.|
||Imperious, highly intelligent, impossibly cruel - you wield your intelligence and wit like a cudgel, bludgeoning those around you into passive submission. Keep an eye out for cooperative test partners with low self esteem and body image issues.|
||Inquisitive, sensitive - you analyze situations and approach problems with care. You value friendship highly. Your ideal cooperative partner would be brave and up for anything.|
||You're the quiet, artistic type, happy to ponder the solution to a puzzle in quiet solitude. Compatible cooperative test partners include introspective loners, deaf-mute invisible people, and mannequins.|
||No nonsense and all business, you don't have time for anything not immediately in your field of vision. Look for cooperative test partners who don't mind telling you they're still there every five seconds, and test partners willing to solve tests while always standing in front of you.|
||Funny, high-strung, a bit of a motor-mouth - these are the words people would use to describe you when they're not telling you to shut up. Your ideal cooperative test partners include people who won't mind you bumbling around breaking things while they do all the work.|
||Stalwart and dependable, you're always willing to give a friend the shirt off your back, a shoulder to cry on, or a step up. Compatible cooperative test partners include shirtless people who can't stop crying while they use you as stairs.|
- Aperture Science Collaborative Disposition Test on the Portal 2 blog